Genre: Rock-and-Roll Drama (Literally)
Premise: Molly McGee, a young girl with hopes of being a musician, goes on tour with an aged, one time Rock Star. After meeting another famous star, Jack Colt, a love triangle is created between the three with Molly at the center. Also, it’s about music so every time a scene gets a little too intense we cut to a rock and roll number.
About: This film was re-written by Eszterhas, from a script by Scott Richardson. Lorimar, who was producing, felt that Richardson was too much of a baby writer. So they brought on Eszterhas. It’s worth noting this is the only Richardson script, and he later became a costumer/prop person on Lord of the Rings. In the end, Hearts of Fire essentially became a star-vehicle for Dylan, who if you aren’t up to date with music history was about two steps away from being a crazy old hobo in the mid 1980’s. The love triangle fell apart because Dylan liked rather than hated Rupert Everett, the other musician, and neither wanted to kiss Molly. Richard Marquand directed Return of the Jedi. Let’s all bow our heads. Because he’s more remembered for directing this piece of crap and passing away soon after.
Writers: Joe “My Scripts Are So Bad They Kill People” Eszterhas
The challenge to writing a Rock and Roll film is hardly ever the story in which the music is laid. Rather, it’s hard to make sure the music is good enough and highlights the emotional punch of the scenes. Now, Purple is a good example of that. I’ve never seen Hearts of Fire, but I’m sure that without any major acts attached, this film fell victim as a music movie about bad music. (And I have to add, a lot of the musicians in Hearts of Fire I do like, John Hiatt and Dylan, but these songs represent their weaker efforts. Dylan had been contracted to write a whole album of new material, but in actuality ended up only writing two new songs). So asides from this whole problematic thing that the script is suggesting music that I know full well blows, let’s talk about plot mechanics.
The beginning is very generic. Molly works at a toll booth and is an aspiring rock singer who performs with her band at a local bar. (This is exactly unforgettable in the way almost all cheesy 80’s movies open. In the Eszterhas style, the whole thing starts off with a robbery and then goes back to being slow). At the bar, Molly meets an English rock star, her idol, who lives in seclusion and offers to take her to England with him to place at an oldies concert. (The jaded and cynical love interest). She accepts, but soon grows pissed at how the Englishman handles his image and his music. So she seeks solace in Jack Colt, another British Rock Star. (Who is sort of a sex fiend, of course Eszterhas couldn’t get through a script without sex). Colt produces Molly’s first album. Molly and Colt start knocking booties, and tour America. (There’s one touch here I like about a blind woman who goes to see all of Colts shows and how she’s unpolluted by the music. It’s sad and sweet and my favorite part in the entire movie. I also like that Colt’s daughter discusses titties, but that’s a whole other tangent). Molly ends back on stage with her mentor. And in the end, Molly gives up both men for a shot at stardom. (The Eszterhas “Screw You World” sort of ending). I’d be interested to compare the Richardson draft to this to see which elements were entirely created by Eszterhas.
So ultimately, this film is about musicians (which we’ve seen before many, many times) and the love triangle (which never feels like it gets off the ground because in the script it feels like Molly is only sleeping or entangled with either of the men as a result to leverage her own career). So reading Hearts of Fire, it felt like there was a core missing. Now, add onto this some unconvincing acting and you have a film that flounders.
Scooby Doo (Complete Crap)
Atilla (Poor, Few Redeeming Qualities)
[X] - Wedding Crashers (Mediocre)
Hot Rod (Good)
Definitely Maybe (Pretty Darn Good)
Isla Prospects: There’s really only one female in the entire film, Molly. She’s an impressionable, young teen with aspirations of becoming a famous musician. Sadly, these days of youth have passed Isla Fisher by.
What I Learned: You only have what’s on the page. And as someone who is engaged in writing a rock film that features songs, that’s got to be nerve wracking. Ultimate rock films are only as good as their soundtrack and when you’re using two washed up Dylan songs, I don’t know how this thing could be anything but abysmal. Add on to the fact that there’s a weak structure, an unconvincing love triangle, and every few pages the script makes a weird associate leap that I don’t follow and you have something I’ve never seen but can almost single handedly assure is a piece of garbage.
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